Identity Blockers

From my 2017 Retreat: “Diamonds”

I already know… one of my lifetime goals is to help women pursue purpose through deciding to love themselves, lead and leverage the playing ground by how they navigate the world before them. To live authentically, and experience Carpe’ diem! (Seize the day!)- via self expression, finding their voices and creating their own self-laws. Let me tell you… we cannot do this ideally with our identity suffering. There are many identity blockers that challenge us to think, behave and believe differently, every day of our lives. If we believe the things our minds tell us sometimes, then we will truly fail. And just because we have heard it a lot, doesn’t mean it’s actually true. In my dream, I desire to challenge women to be more of their ideal selves than who they really imagined themselves to be. I realized after working with so many women overtime – either through therapy, through small groups I’ve created for writing groups, book clubs, or mentoring groups that we all essentially desire to get to know ourselves, better when we are in the company of other women.

And better is good… because it helps us to stop and drive forward for our best selves. Just take time to notice and meditate on how you allow any of the identity blockers (above) to alter your course, in life. If you notice a few, ask yourself whats one way I can notice someone with the exact opposite ( of that identity blocker ) and ask them to share their story , or mentor me in some way, So I can learn that skill, too? I was just sharing with my mentoring group how I struggled a bit trying to determine what was right for me; as I began to wield my “two edged -one word. I chuckle within myself, because My ‘one word’ for 2020, has become a focus of intentional regard and expression as I reach for this new identity !

I am finding the more I, seek for meaning with my word, the more I get invigorated to say more. And then I smile, because ‘asking, seeking and knocking’ are all concepts to help us grow and evolve. They are all principles that help us to manifest and develop into our best selves.

Are you truly asking, seeking and knocking for opportunity? Because the promises attached to this saying says : If you “ask it shall be given unto you, seek you and you shall find, and knock, and the door shall be opened unto you. (Matt 7:7)

ASK: “to challenge , to inquire to be on the hunt for…

SEEK: this one means to answer, pursue, and track down.

KNOCK: Did you know to knock means to ask again? It also means to seek. ( haha!) Isn’t that interesting.. we are asked to ask and then ask again… and seek some more… (Never stop asking or seeking!) There’s EXTREME benefit in it. Pretty deep huh?

Manifesting you’re dreams is good, I suppose . Just be mindful to not always set out with an intention to show off your gifts. Begin with purpose, ride the wave… and then you will end up surfing into another plan, another opportunity and another way to manage your gifts with lots of supporters around you; asking : How can we be a part of this thriving community!?

Advertisement

No Longer A Wounded Soldier.

One day, I was in the woods, and I freed my soul. I attended a retreat, and sometimes that’s how you have to actually FREE yourself, you know, in nature…you go to those kind of places to retreat, and to hear yourself think, speak and and ponder. I really cannot recall the exact wounded soldier story; but perhaps this one fits. I did some soul work at this retreat. I came back feeling so invigorated.
It was in. It had autumn and to be honest, I was wounded. I had to get to the cool in the mornings, and I was trying to rejuvenate my soul. I was soul-weary. Just tired. The kind of tired you can be when no one else can understand it, kind of tired.
And here’s what I heard in my spirit: “No longer wounded, are you, soldier.” (Here’s a story that goes along with it, though…)
​It was a fierce battle even for a soldier as seasoned as he was. No one knows for sure how the events transpired as they did. When it happened, it was almost over before it began. The soldier has had a lot of time to reflect on the battles leading up to this one. It had taken years of faithful duty for his commander to put him in such a front line position. The soldier had been decorated many times for standing strong against the enemy. He was not one of the ones who had to be coaxed into battle. He had seen first hand the destruction left in the wake of his enemy. He had seen the destroyed lives. He cannot remember the countless times he had talked so many through tough and difficult decisions in their own battles. He had relayed countless messages from his commander to others who were looking to find a place of safety against the onslaught of enemy weapons. He knew the importance of being prepared for battle. He had seen a lot of others who were not well prepared fall in the fight. He had always tried to make sure every skill and weapon was razor sharp. He knew his life and the lives of others depended on it. There had been times when he was amazed that he was still standing when the day of battle had ended. He had encouraged many a young warrior to stand strong and not faint at the fierce attacks of the enemy. There were occasional times when he was allowed to get some much needed rest but usually his life was spent being in a state of alertness and total awareness of everything around him. It was very seldom there was a lull in the enemies attacks. Usually if he wasn’t fighting on his on lines he was helping a brother soldier not be swamped by the enemy. There had been several times when he had to call for reinforcements and there was a special squad his commander kept in store to send to every soldiers aid. This special squad was terrible in their strength. Nothing could stand before them but the brunt of the battle was not given to them. Those were horrible times indeed but he thrilled at the way his commander had taken care of him. He would gladly follow wherever he was commanded to go, without question. I suppose in hind sight he had been able to see the attack coming but it looked like the same kind of battle he had fought so many times before and he wasn’t overly concerned. After all, hind sight is twenty/twenty.”

During the retreat, I noticed the weariness of my soul.I didn’t quite know it was weary til I really took the time to pull away and spend time on myself.

Alone. Yet observing Self.
From the outside looking in.
Well, if you read the story above- you will understand the place where I was. Sometimes, our souls can become weary because of ourselves. We then find ourselves without aid or assistance even we are really in a hard place.
I never want to be there, ever again. So we were given this exercise on the retreat asking us to nurture and care for our wounded soldier by walking out into the woods and comforting her. Taking time to empathize with her and tell her that she had every right to protect this space inside of her and to stop fighting fires and putting out other battles but to learn to fight our own battle, and not feel guilty or alone any more about doing it. So sympathize and empathize with our need for self- compassion and herald the battles we have fought, but also congratulate ourselves for a job well done. And for having the COURAGE to endure.

We were encouraged to take time to HEAL.
And I made a declaration in the woods, that day that I would build my own fortress and support my own cause and begin to herald my own work before I supported another’s cause.
And I was set free.
Like a bird, I flew that day in the woods.
Since that day, many things have been born. And I am grateful.
So even if you don’t have time, today, read that story, ( either here, or above).
And herald your own cause, fight your own battle, and save yourself.
Listen. To Yourself.
Be With Yourself.
Heal Yourself.

​Because…
You’re so worth it.